measi

Title: The Choice
Author:

measi
Pairing: Nine/Rose
Rating: All Ages
Spoilers: None - happens during Series One
Beta:

talonscar... getting sucked into his wife's enjoyment of fic. (grins evily)
Author Notes: This was written for the "More than Friends" ficathon on

hearts_in_time. Prompts used were: The Lovers tarot card and "The Doctor finds Rose wearing his leather jacket." Standard disclaimers about how I'm poor and don't own anything applies.

The Choice

All around him, the world spins in confusion. Hillsides roll at impossible angles, dropping off into nothingness. He sees fragments of the world drifting in space, the green and amber hues of their grasses gleaming in the hazy sunlight above. Rivers meander down their beds, dropping off of the endless chasms in steady waterfalls, the spray of water steaming down into invisible nothingness. Large herd animals graze calmly, unaware that their footsteps are mere feet away from unexplained doom. It is a world of dichotomy, of confusion among the calm.

He’s been here once before, this planet without a name. The Time Lords named it the World of Choices generations ago – a world accessible only in dreams, by those whose fates are locked at a crossroads. As a child, he heard that this place was a caller of dreams, of potential futures, where all of the possible timelines come together for each individual who walks its paths, and the walker chooses the path best suited for healthy ongoing life. It’s much different than his last visit here, however. Then, he’d traveled a rocky path among barren, jagged peaks. His choice had been one that had determined the fate of the Time Lords themselves. His decision was one he still found impossible to discuss, out of shame and anger. He still doubted that choice, even though he knew – for the greater good – it was the right one.

He’s relieved that this time, fate appears to not feel so stern with him. He smiles as he walks the well-tended path, the weight of his continuous grief lightened by his surroundings. Flowering trees line the path, a few of their petals trickling down like raindrops, tickled by the breeze that carries their soft, jasmine-like scent. He feels comfortable here, knowing that he’s on the right path, living his life alone without attachment. It’s safer this way, after all. No ties to any one place, no risk of breaking his heart along the way. No more responsibility to his own race or to anyone else’s. He’ll stop and help where he can, but skip places where he knows he will get too attached. An easy life of traveling – that’s all he wants; the life that he can lead only by being on his own.

As he reaches a fork in the road, he stops. Which route to take? To the right, the flowering trees continue, the path bright and continuing to be well kept. He knows that he’ll be safe there, knows he should go that way. When he turns to the left, he gasps at the sight several meters away, and realizes that he’s now at his crossroad – the one at which the World of Choices has determined will decide his life.

In front of an apple tree bursting with blooms, the glowing form of a woman rests. He cannot make out her features, yet he recognizes her instantly, awestruck by the rush of emotion that washes over him. He cannot walk away from her; he knows this. To do so would undo all of the healing he’s experienced since the Time War. To walk away from her would be to walk away from everything he’s learned, everything he is – and everything he knows to be right.

As he watches, the glow dims, revealing the woman he already knows is there. Rose sits, eyes closed, her shoulders wrapped in a brown shawl. She’s dressed for bed, wearing a simple, silky blue pyjama set. He’s never seen her like this before, the layers of life’s experience washed away. Her face is scrubbed clean of makeup, her arms and feet pink from the warmth of a recent bath. Here, Rose glows with the ethereal nature of the World of Choices – the object of his crossroads.

Without even questioning, he leaves his path, walking toward Rose’s tree. At first, she does not appear to notice him. She continues to sit, eyes closed, a curious little smile on her face. As he creeps closer, he notices that the brown shawl is not a shawl at all, but is instead his battered leather jacket.

“Rose?” His voice is smaller than he’d expect.

Her eyes flutter open, and she frowns, momentarily confused as she gazes at the strange world around her. “Where are we? Doctor – where’s the TARDIS?” Her voice rises quickly in pitch as her senses sharpen. “I’d just gone to bed…”

“You’re all right, Rose,” he reassures. “You’re still on the TARDIS. It’s just a dream.”

She blinks. “A – dream? I don’t understand… how could I be talking to you in a dream?”

He sighs and attempts to deflect the question. “You never have dreams where you have conversations with people?”

“Not like this, no.”

“Oh.” Attempt failed.

“So… if we’re still in the TARDIS, why am I sitting in the grass against an apple tree?”

“You’re here because I need to make a choice.”

“About what?”

At first, he doesn’t answer her because he knows what choice he’s making here. He knows he’s in love with her – has known for a while now that it’s beyond a mere fascination or attraction. Ever since she stated her willingness to sacrifice her life for the good of her planet, he’s loved her. Her pureness of heart, the goodness she projects without effort awes him.

The world flashes, and he’s in his own memories , leaning against the wall of the main boardroom in Ten Downing Street. Rose and Harriet Jones stand with him, pacing as they decide their next move. Rose says something about finding a way out, and he begins to speak instinctively.

There’s always been a way out,” he mutters gruffly. “But I can’t guarantee your daughter will be safe.”

“Don’t you dare! Whatever it is, don’t you dare!” Jackie’s voice squeaks over the phone.

“That’s the thing, if I don’t dare, everyone dies.”

“Do it.”

His eyes snap up, astonished like he was when he first heard them. She stands there, her eyes boring into him. “You don’t even know what it is. You’d just let me?”

“Yeah.”

Jackie pleads, claiming she’s just a kid, but he cuts her off. Rose’s choice cannot be ignored. “This is my life, Jackie. It’s not fun. It’s not smart. It’s just standing up and making a decision because no one else will.”

“Then what’s stopping you?” Rose asks.

“Because I could save the world, but lose you.” He stares at her, and she looks back at him with that same serene smile she had when he first approached her at the apple tree…

Realization floods him as the tree ripples back into view, and he knows his choice is made. “You love me, too.”

“Yes,” she responds without reservation. She holds out a hand to him, and he grasps it firmly, helping her to her feet.

He leans down, placing the gentlest of kisses against her lips. In the single moment before she responds he panics. But then her lips part, and she returns the kiss eagerly, flooding his senses with the warmth of her love and desire. The kiss deepens, and he feels the emotional walls he’s built around himself to keep himself angry and full of shame since the Time War dissolve instantly.

Breaking the kiss, he leads her back to the fork in the road. She quickly matches his strides, swinging his hand playfully as the grass swishes around their feet. Once back at the crossroad, they turn, and he smiles. The two paths have blended into one – the fruit trees and flowering trees merged along what now is a paved road, full of promise. He leans down and kisses her once more, closing his eyes as the kiss deepens.

Upon opening them, he smiles against Rose’s lips. They are back in the TARDIS, standing in the console room. As in his dream, Rose is dressed in her PJ’s and his jacket. He pulls it tighter around her and whispers in her ear.

The path chosen, they walk into the depths of the TARDIS, their fates intertwined and complete.

--- END ---